Some among us experience the world differently than others. Our emotions are deeper. Our senses are heightened. We cannot see another's pain without feeling it in our bodies, hearts, and souls.
This kind of sensitivity is called Highly Sensitive Person or HSP.
The joys that we experience are difficult to describe. Be it a glorious sunset, a haunting piece of music, or a phrase that encapsulates beauty or insight, we feel it to the marrow of our bones.
The pain we experience is just as profound. Be it personal or global, it permeates our very souls and affects us more than we would like.
Those who are HSP know what I am talking about. They know that this part of being sensitive is the hardest part of all....making the deep joys we are capable of experiencing almost not worth it.
To survive being HSP without it overwhelming us over and over again, it is important to protect ourselves from things that deplete our energy and joy and cripple us emotionally. We do this when we learn how to set boundaries.
Boundaries are not a firm, rigid, or intractable wall. They are fluid, set according to each situation and person, as well as our needs.
Here are some ways you can start setting boundaries for yourself:
Learn the many ways to say "no" when you need to.
Learn about the trauma response of fawning, the tendency to people-please, which makes us forget our identity, get easily overwhelmed, and become codependent.
Choose your inner circle wisely. (This is not about love, it is about safety, protection, and self-care.)
Take time to recover and rejuvenate your spirit with self-care. This is the reason you need to learn how to say no to endless obligations and doing favors for others.
Know who you are and what you believe. Then speak from that place instead of trying to placate others or be silent.
Many who are not HSP will not understand our sensitivity. So it is up to us to understand it so we will not get confused and further overwhelmed when told to get over things, move on, grow up, or any of the other comments we often hear.
Then and only then, we can carry this gift without the constant heaviness.